It Is Right

In the last 6 weeks I have been seriously dragging. Mostly due to sickness, which I assumed was bad allergies (with such a mild winter, the trees really popped) but now we're thinking it's been a sinus infection... And after feeling "sick" for nearly 6 weeks, I realize how tired I am becoming.

Finals are this week.

Luckily mine are not too bad, but since I didn't do hardly any homework last week, I'm starting to feel the stress.

Compile that stress to the constant tiredness I have felt for weeks (as though I can't find any energy) and I find myself questioning if I really should be doing Summer Semester which starts on Monday--meaning no break for me between finals of Spring to the start of Summer (it's the space of one weekend).

Should I continue with my plans to go to Summer Semester? Will I even survive? Because right now, it's looking like quite the mountain to climb, and I have forgotten all my gear...

The original idea of going to Summer school arrived back in March. It was the week prior to General Conference, and I set up a meeting with my Academic Advisor for help on what I should do. I currently don't know exactly what I want to do with my life (I have ideas, more solid now at the end of the semester, but I'm still generally at a loss). I was hoping that by me taking the initiative to talk to the advisor prior to General Conference, I might receive an answer. It's like seeking it out in your mind first, then going to Him and asking if the decision is right.

While I met with my advisor, she made the casual comment of perhaps doing a summer semester and getting some of my general education requirements done, which some also happen to be prerequisites to classes only available in Fall (meaning, if I waited until Fall to take these Summer courses, it would be another YEAR before I could take other classes that I need).

Even though Summer was mentioned briefly, and we laid out a plan as though I were going to go to Summer, I still wasn't entirely convinced. I mean, who goes to summer school?

I went in to General Conference Weekend with the question of, "Heavenly Father, do you really want me to go to Summer school as opposed to working on other things I feel are pressing (like projects around the house, taking better care of myself physically--i.e. learning to cook, etc.)". I expressed how I felt like I should go to school, but I was nervous, scared even, because it is something different, something new. A change.

In the last year I feel I have had my fill of change.

However, if going to Summer school was the answer for me, I was going to try and embrace it.

I remember when it happened. I was sitting in the Conference Center during the Saturday morning session as Elder Dallin H. Oaks spoke about sacrifice and how sacrifice of all things is what creates faith (from "Lectures on Faith"). It was this concept of sacrificing something now for the greater good and that would benefit in the long run.

Was that my answer?

Was I suppose to sacrifice the free-time I was sure to have this summer for something greater? Would this sacrifice help create the faith I needed to get through the semester?

My answer: Yes.

The following is taken directly from my journal, written during Elder Oaks' talk:

"Perhaps one of the sacrifices I need to make is the sacrifice of time and money to go to school. By sacrificing, I know the Lord will bless and help me (both financially as well as educationally). Right now, I feel like I have a great urge to get schooling done so I can then focus on starting a family. I also feel that the moment I commit to that, the Lord will bless me by leading me to the man I will marry and start my family with."

Now, looking back on this, I already know one of those things have happened.

You see, I honestly didn't think I would have enough money to cover tuition for Summer, seeing as I hadn't planned to pay tuition until the Fall. But the Lord, in His great mercy, acting upon my own faith, He blessed me with a substantial Tax Refund this year--enough to cover Summer tuition and still have some to apply towards Fall. To me, this is a real testament that Heavenly Father does know us and knows what we need. We can also take His blessings to be the sign we are on the right path.

But, now having been sick for such a long time, and feeling so tired... I almost feel as though perhaps I jumped too soon. Perhaps I'm not ready to dive off the deep end and be involved with schooling straight through the year...

And then I read the following quote tonight from Jeffrey R. Holland's book, "Created For Greater Things":

"With any major decision there are cautions and considerations to make, but once there has been illumination [revelation], beware the temptation to retreat from a good thing. If it was right when you prayed about it and trusted it and lived for it, it is right now."

What Elder Holland talks about is true. I think I'm in the "temptation to retreat" stage. But, in a way, couldn't that simply be Satan trying to tempt me to not go to Summer school? For all know, I may just meet a nice young man in one of my classes and we just fall head over heals for each other. Perhaps Satan realizes this and so he's trying to prevent it. It certainly wouldn't be the first time he's tried something like this on me. So, with Elder Holland's quote in mind, I take my leap of faith. Even though I don't quite feel ready to jump, I am going for it. It's like what Elder Oaks talks about regarding sacrifice and that it is only through sacrifice that we truly come to learn and appreciate the value of faith. It is through faith that overcome trials and changes, even difficulties that arise in our life. Through faith, anything is possible.

Therefore, it is in faith that I continue to take this leaping bound through this Final's Week and land straight on Monday, the start of a new term. Even if I still feel uneasy about the decision, and have those moments that seem like they will overwhelm me, I take a deep breath and remember...

"If it was right when you prayed about it and trusted it and lived for it, it is right now."

And my peace returns.

The End of an Era

So today marks a monumental day for me.

You see, after years of being popular, I finally got around to reading the Harry Potter series from start to finish.  In middle school I remember reading "Sorcerer's Stone" and "Chamber of Secrets" for an English class.  I later read "Prisoner of Azkaban" but never any of the others.

As the movies came out, I found myself thoroughly enjoying them.  I was 13 when the first movie was released and I found myself enjoying the movies, however I was not crazy about them.

Well, the years went on and 2007 rolled around.

I was working the midnight release of the seventh and final book ("Deathly Hallows") and thoroughly enjoyed the event.  It was absolute craziness in our small store, but such an amazing night--definitely one of the highlights of all the years I have worked at the Bookstore.  After the customers left, I went outside to wait for my dad (who happened to be closing the store).  In my waiting, I chose to start reading the seventh book.

Keep in mind, I had only just seen movie five and not read book six.

Yes, I was quite confused upon reading the first page and a half and quickly realized my error.  The following week I was reading book six and it was a whirlwind of an experience, a lot of which I still had no idea about (seeing as it had been so long since I had read any of the others, and I never did read book five).

However, despite having finished book six, I didn't get around to reading book seven.

The years continued on, and movie Seven Part One was released.

I didn't go see it.  Life was busy and I wasn't exactly super crazy about the movies like everyone else seemed to be.  Yes, I enjoyed them, they just weren't my favorite.

The movie was released in November.

I went to see it in February.

Boy, was I ever glad I waited!!  The movie had me enthralled, and the cliff-hanger just about killed me.  I was so grateful I only had to wait 5 months to see the next movie while others had to wait 8!

When midnight release tickets went on sale for Part Two, I rushed out and purchased mine.  There were reasons I wanted to be among the first to see the ending.  One: the cliff-hanger nearly killed me!!  But more importantly, two: I viewed going to the premiere as being a chance of a lifetime.  Here, I had grown up with Harry Potter and being able to see the conclusion--how it all ended--without having read the book, sounded amazing.  You see, I'm a very visual person, and I chose to go see the movie prior to reading the book so the midnight premiere would be a surprise.  Truly, as I sat to wait in line at 5:30 pm that evening, I couldn't even begin to imagine what was in store.

I was also going into it rather partial.

Not having been a "huge" fan, it would be interesting to see how it all ended--to see if it would live up to the high expectations so many around me had built up in my mind, and blow me away with some kind of twist, pulling everything together in the end.

I was not disappointed.

After seeing the final movie, I was blown away at the skill and pure genious that is J.K. Rowling.  She was able to create this amazing world and this absolutely incredible story... and still was able to tie everything together in the end.  The humongous twist in the plot I had not anticipated.  Had I suspected some things?  Yes.  Did they play out the way I had imagined?  Not in the slightest!  I had ideas, but in no way was I prepared for what I was watching as I sat in the darkness of that theater at 1:30 in the morning.

As the lights went on, people were crying...

The end of an era had arrived.

The books had ended in 2007...

The movies had reached their end in 2011...

Knowing it was over, people were gripped with happiness, as well as a sadness that filled their heart at the realization that it was over.

I did not fully understand this...

Not until tonight.

Not until after I had read all seven books cover to cover, and watched all eight movies again.

Tonight I feel those same stirrings that the audience had on the night of the premiere.   Overall, I feel a sense of peace, a sense of completeness after having finished the series.  At the same time, there is also a yearning, a desire for more; similar in ways to when a loved one passes: You have enjoyed the good times you had with them, but now that they're gone, you continue yearning for more.

But the great thing about books and movies: They can always been read or watched again, and again, and again.

In the words of Sirius Black, "The ones that love us never truly leave us."

The same goes for books and movies, in my opinion.

So, to commemorate this special day, I have decided to browse YouTube and find a tribute video for Harry Potter.  This first video is one that gave me chills, especially at 3:15.  It's not perfect, and it has flaws, but it makes the video unique in its own way and I feel it conveys the "epic-ness" that is Harry Potter.

This next video, I simply found hilarious and perfectly goes through the story that is Harry Potter.  It's very unique and I thoroughly enjoyed it!

And this video is the same audio from the video above, but timed beautifully to the actual movie footage.  So great!

And last but not least, is my own video in which I made last year. It was one of the last videos I ever edited--having given up the hobby shortly thereafter...

So, although the Harry Potter series has become a huge part of my life a littler later than for most, I am still extremely grateful to have been a part of this era.  I will have the opportunity to tell my children that I grew up with Harry Potter and that the actors who played in the movies are only one year younger than I am (then again, that does attest to my age, doesn't it?)

Even though this is the end of an era for me... It will continue to live on in the pages, in the movies, and in--especially--in my heart.  In the words of J.K. Rowling herself:

"The stories we love best do live in us forever, so whether you come back by page or by the big screen, Hogwarts will always be there to welcome you home."

Slow Down & Observe

October 9, 1988

The next time you're having a bad day or when life gets really busy, take the time to slow down and look around at what you have been blessed with in life. Whether that's nature, a loving family, or even simply being blessed to breathe and be alive...

If we take that moment to stop and look around, we might just find the little rain cloud that is hanging over our head is producing a rainbow.

And if we hadn't slowed down and taken that time to look, we would have missed it.

In His Own Time

It has been an incredible week. A LOT has happened (and I do plan to blog about it this weekend, so you will not receive many details in this specific entry...). But tonight I simply had to share this. It couldn't wait until this weekend.

Tonight I concluded I should at least read my lesson I'm to teach on Sunday, seeing as I haven't had a chance to even look at it due to the craziness of the week (again, more details coming later). Instead of digging out my book, I decided to use my iPad!

I was in the General Conference talks section (where I had left it from the night before). It was the October 1998 Conference. I randomly selected a talk, which happened to be by Elder Hales entitled, "Healing Soul and Body".

Amazed at what I was seeing--the "chances" of me randomly choosing this specific topic at this specific time is no coincidence to me. As I read, I found AMAZING words of wisdom that brought added peace to my life this night.

This first one is a quote (quoted by Elder Hales) by Elder Orson F. Whitney in 1966:

"No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God, … and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire”
(quoted in Improvement Era, Mar. 1966, 211). [Robert D. Hales, 1998 October General Conference, Healing Soul and Body]

And this next quote is what truly stuck with me out of the entire talk. It is now one of my favorite quotes! I know Pres. Uchtdorf spoke something similar to this in a recent Conference address, but I don't recall what the title of the talk is right off the top of my head. (If you know, please leave a comment and let me know! Thanks you!)

"I have come to understand how useless it is to dwell on the whys, what ifs, and if onlys for which there likely will be given no answers in mortality. To receive the Lord’s comfort, we must exercise faith. The questions Why me? Why our family? Why now? are usually unanswerable questions. These questions detract from our spirituality and can destroy our faith. We need to spend our time and energy building our faith by turning to the Lord and asking for strength to overcome the pains and trials of this world and to endure to the end for greater understanding."
[Robert D. Hales, 1998 October General Conference, Healing Soul and Body. Emphasis added.

There have been some major changes that have taken place in my
life today. But--as in all times of trial, struggle, or change--this is our time to not ask the question of WHY, but instead ask the question "What can I learn from this experience?"

And I promise you, having seen this doctrine work in my own life, you WILL receive the peace and assurance you need to press forward with faith into the darkness, knowing at some point the light will eventually shine.

Until that point comes: Simply endure with faith that the Lord has a plan and He knows what is best for each of us, even in times when we don't even know ourselves--most especially in these times. He created us, He knows us better than we do. But most importantly, He loves us. He truly wants the best for each of us and can see our potential, but we must act in faith, believing He knows the path.

I know that He does have a plan and He will lead us to the path we are to take in this life.

So act on your faith! Take that step into the unknown, trusting the Lord will show you where you need to be.

And in His own time...

He will.

An Easter Reflection

This year, I learned something interesting.

Growing up, my family and I would always watch the Ten Commandments movie on TV at Easter time.




I'll admit, I never quite understood why we would watch it when, to me, there wasn't anything related to Christ in it.

The other night, I had the strongest inclination to watch the Prince of Egypt movie (since it has been YEARS since I've seen the Ten Commandments).




Well, I finally learned some things.

First, the whole reason we would watch the Ten Commandments movie on TV is because Easter coincides with the Jewish holiday ("Holy Day") of Passover. Where did the Passover all begin? In Egypt with Moses of course! When the tenth and final plague was sent forth, God had informed Moses that He would go out amongst Egypt and take every firstborn.

From Exodus 11, we read:

4 And Moses said, Thus saith the Lord, About midnight will I go out into the midst of Egypt:

5 And all the firstborn in the land of Egypt shall die, from the firstborn of Pharaoh that sitteth upon his throne, even unto the firstborn of the maidservant that is behind the mill; and all the firstborn of beasts.

It then goes on to say how the Lord instructed Moses to tell the Hebrews to take an unblemished lamb and slay it, using its blood to mark the posts of every door. When the "Angel of Death" passes through, it will see the blood on their door and not enter. Thereby, it will pass over their house.

Exodus 12
12 For I will pass through the land of Egypt this night, and will smite all the firstborn in the land of Egypt, both man and beast; and against all the gods of Egypt I will execute judgment: I am the Lord.

13 And the blood shall be to you for a token upon the houses where ye are: and when I see the blood, I will pass over you, and the plague shall not be upon you to destroy you, when I smite the land of Egypt.

So, now that you know the background, let me talk to you for a moment about something I noticed.

Remember how I thought this movie had nothing to do with Christ? Well, I was wrong. This particular scene in the movie made me realize some connections. The first being the lamb's blood painted over the doorways of houses.

Jesus Christ is also considered the Lamb of God. If we put this knowledge into the context of the story: You would take the blood of Christ and paint it over your door to ensure salvation from the judgment of God.

The blood of Christ being the Atonement.

What does this all mean? It reminds me of how we must apply the Atonement to the doors in our life, and thereby be saved from the Angel of Death (or this could be turned around to say, saved by the temptations of the world). If we would be "paint our doors" with the blood of Christ, we will be protected against the evil that is in this world. We would be saved.

Another similarity with this same story is the fact that when the Hebrews slaughtered the lamb and used its blood on their doors, they were then commanded to eat all of the lamb.

Exodus 12
7 And they shall take of the blood, and strike it on the two side posts and on the upper door post of the houses, wherein they shall eat it.

8 And they shall eat the flesh in that night, roast with fire, and aunleavened bread; and with bitter herbs they shall eat it.

9 Eat not of it raw, nor asodden at all with water, but roast with fire; his head with his legs, and with the bpurtenance thereof.

10 And ye shall let nothing of it aremain until the morning; and that which remaineth of it until the morning ye shall burn with fire.

To me, this symbolizes partaking of Christ, taking Him into us. I find this also symbolic of the Sacrament, when we eat the bread. In a very real sense, we are taking Christ into our being.

So we can now see that the Passover, the Ten Commandments movie, and the Prince of Egypt all have to do with Christ, and therefore are befitting an Easter celebration.

For Christ lives. He truly lives. He suffered in Gethsemane, bleeding from every pore, so that you and I can not only return to our Heavenly Father but that we might also communicate with Him in this life, and feel of His presence. The Atonement of Jesus Christ and the suffering He endured on the cross is something I don't think we can ever come to fully comprehend in this life. But I still make it an effort to learn and study about it, coming to a better appreciation of its power, especially how it blessing my life.

But the Atonement is not the only thing I am grateful for.

One of the most amazing things Christ ever did for us was conquer death. Today (Sunday) marks the day when Christ was Resurrected. After having given up His spirit on the cross, He rose on the third day. He came forth out of the tomb with a physical body, perfect and whole.

And we will all have the chance to be resurrected someday. When Christ comes again. Our bodies will be made whole and perfected in Christ, therefore, any ailment or illness or disfigurement of our body will be changed. I am so grateful for this! For I cannot help but think of my mother who passed away a little less than a year ago, and how, though she struggled with the progressive disease of Rheumatoid Arthritis, she will be made whole at the Second Coming of Christ. This brings me tremendous hope because I can only imagine what she will be able to do and accomplish if her body is not holding her back. I look forward to that day.

I know that my Redeemer lives. I know that He atoned and died for us so that we have the opportunity to live with our Heavenly Father again. I know that by "painting the doors" in our life with Christ's Atonement, applying it in every aspect of our life, we will see a change begin. This change will bring about the greatest of happiness. A happiness that you cannot find in this world.

I know that Jesus Christ arose from the grave on the third day and is living with our Heavenly Father in flesh and blood, just as we will have that opportunity in the future.

By putting our faith and trust in our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, we will be able to conquer any trial that may come upon us, knowing that They are with us.

All these things and more are what I am pondering on this beautiful early Easter morning.

After Conference Thoughts

This weekend was the annual General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and I just wanted to share some insights I received.

First of all, I had the fortunate opportunity to actually travel down to Salt Lake City and attend the Saturday Morning session in person. Despite being seated in the balcony, it was simply amazing to be present in the same room as Apostles and the Prophet. The Spirit felt was truly incredible.

They always recommend going into Conference with a question or a concern, for what better time to receive an answer than while listening to prophets, seers, and revelators?

My question was less of a question and more seeking a confirmation. You see, I've been pondering about attending classes in the summer, but that was something I had never before considered and therefore was a bit daunting. It wasn't until this last week when I met with my academic advisor that the idea popped up. She recommended attending, seeing as I could take some prerequisite classes that would help me get into others in the Fall. The idea sounded great and as the week pressed on--Conference drawing ever closer--it simply felt "right". But I wanted to make sure. So I went into Conference with the hope I would receive a confirmation that I am indeed supposed to be attending classes this summer.

And would you know, the Lord did answer.

It was confirmed to me that I needed to make school a priority (for pressing reasons unknown to me at this time) and that includes taking classes during the summer.

So, I just want to testify that the Lord does hear our prayers and He will answer them. I would encourage you to go into the next Conference (in October) with a question, because it will be answered.

Another insight I noticed was how often the theme of family came up; especially how important raising children is. Making a marriage work (or in my case, simply getting married) and raising children is a HUGE responsibility, one that should not be taken lightly--even though the world is leaning that direction. These are the BIGGEST decisions we will ever make in this life, and they affect us throughout eternity! Again, these things should NEVER be taken lightly.

And finally, my last point.

At Conference there always seems to be mention of building our foundation upon Christ.

I want to elaborate just a bit more.

You see, I'm currently in an Interior Design class this semester and we just happen to finish a unit talking about the structure of a building. I have learned something key to building a structure:

The foundation is not the first thing poured into the ground. It is the footing that is poured at a horizontal level which gives the foundation its strength.

Therefore, as I listened to talks speaking of building upon Christ, I realized that...

The Footing = Jesus Christ
The Foundation = Our Faith
The Scaffolding = The Gospel

So, according to that, we must first have the footing laid upon which we build our foundation. The scaffolding is what's placed on the foundation which contains (and protects) the home (our life).

I simply love that!

These were just a few thoughts I had during Conference. I hope you had the opportunity to see or listen to some of the wonderful messages that were shared. If you did not, you can click here and read the summaries. (The full talks will not be available until later this week.)

Now, to apply those things which I have learned. I suppose this is why General Conference is six months apart; it takes that long to get into the habit of applying what we learned from the last session! =)