Principle vs Circumstance

This week--and especially weekend--my eyes have been opened to see my true self in a different light.

On Friday night I went to the Institute activity (the one where I was going to meet my Instructor's wife!), only to be sadly disappointed.  I knew exactly how I wanted things to be--I'd go, find friends, meet my Instructor's family, hang-out, and have a good time--but alas, things did not go "according to plan." (See previous post here).

Well, yesterday (Saturday), I went to the baby shower for my cousin.  Honestly, when I awoke I did not want to go.  I was in one of those moods (as you gathered from the post) where all I wanted to do was stay home and do something physical.  Well, when the baby shower ended around noon, I knew I would be home around 1:00 PM, plenty of time to hit the gym!

On the way into the valley, I received a phone call.  A co-worker was sick and was wondering if I could take the rest of her shift.  Obviously, I agreed--I could use the hours anyway.  So as soon as I got home, I rushed up to work.

Two hours later, I was back at home only to run downtown for some things.

By the time I finally arrived home for the night, it was around 8:00 PM.  It had been a hectic day...

And not at all according to plan.

Funny thing is, my Institute teacher talked about this concept called "Principle vs Circumstance Driven People" during class on Wednesday.  This is the THIRD time I have heard this talk in the last year!  It took me until now for it to really sink in!

Those who are Circumstance Driven tend to change how they behave and the choices they make depending on the circumstances (such as the friends they are with, the things they are doing, etc).  Whereas those who base their life on Principle remain steady and unwavering regardless of the circumstances.

Let's use an example, shall we?

Bob goes out on the town with some friends to a party.  Alcohol is being served and his friends invite him to have a drink.  Now, if Bob were a Circumstance Driven person, he would easily justify the fact that "it's only this one time" or "I don't want to look bad to these guys; they're my friends!"  So he takes a drink and consequences follow.

If Bob were Principle Driven, he would have declined the drink, saying something like he believes in the Word of Wisdom and doesn't want to partake in the drinking.  So he does not take a drink and the consequences follow.

Keep in mind, consequences will follow regardless of the choice you make.  There is always a consequence to every action.  Not all consequences are bad, some of them are good.  Perhaps the consequence of Bob taking the drink involves a car accident on the ride home, or getting into trouble with a girl, or worse yet, he could end up an alcoholic.  On the other hand, the consequences for Bob not taking the drink may include losing some friends, or he could move on to a higher ground and a better way of life.

If you always "Choose the Right" does that mean your life will be easy?

No.  In fact, it's been my experience that at that moment--when the decision is placed before you--it's often harder to make the correct choice (unless previously decided upon).  But once the deed is done, you'll be so glad you made that correct choice.  Choosing the Right does not mean life will be easy, it simply means it will be easier in the long run.  Like a sweet young woman said today during Testimony Meeting today: Sometimes our perspective gets a little skewed in the moment and we forget the long-term picture.

Are you Principle Driven or Circumstance Driven?

Honestly, I found out this weekend I am very much a Circumstance Driven person.  And this needs to change... I find that when things don't work out the way I have planned them in my head, I tend to get depressed or down on myself.  This is not good.  Also, in the past my friends have often affected me emotionally, or had a lot of influence on me, to a great degree (like a roller-coaster ride), and this is one result of being Circumstance Driven.  I could be having the happiest day in the World, and then one thing happens and it ruins my entire day (because it works me up emotionally).  I should not let this happen.  I'm only hurting myself when I do this, and it's certainly not productive!

I need to work at becoming more Principle Driven, so when the bumps do come along, they don't shake my world.